The Wall

Don’t have a spoon?
I can fix that!

Seatbelt broken?
I can fix that!

New TV too big for the old cabinet?
I can fix that!

Electrical problem?
I can fix that!

Car stereo stolen?
I can fix that!

Bookshelf cracking under the weight?
I can fix that!

Can’t afford a real GPS?
I can fix that!

No ice chest?
I can fix that!

Can’t read the ATM screen?
I can fix that!

Car imported from the wrong country?
I can fix that!

Satellite go out in the rain?
I can fix that!

Electric stove broken & can’t heat coffee?
I fixed that.

Wiper motor burned out?
I can fix that!

Display rack falling over?
I can fix that!

Exhaust pipe dragging?
I can fix that!

Gotta feed the baby AND do the laundry?
I can fix that!

Cables falling behind the desk?
I can fix that!

(I actually think that’s ingenious.)

Out of diapers?

I can fix that!

I am speechless!

who’d thought it’d snow in Las Vegas?  Check out my backyard yesterday…

DP:  “Bro’s call me DP, short for Donkey Puncher, get it?  Sometimes I’m Donkey Puncharello, or D to the P, or BIG DP, or um.. King Donko of Punchstania.”

S:  “Dude to the Player! Party Dude! PD! That’s what you should be. Because you’re my Dude! Pal!  I out-party you, I know how to throw.. down! Dude and I almost said Throw Up but I didn’t.. I love my boobs!  my booze! I’d hold boobs all day too.”

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If you can tell me where those lines came from, then you’re the coolest freaking person on this planet.

- Steve-o King of Kimbonia, the OG-DP